Hurtful words

Why is it that the people who are suppose to love us the most can say/do the most hurtful things? Is it because in time we just take someone's love for granted and believe that there's nothing we can say or do that will interfere with that love? Is it because we're tired or cranky or stressed or just plain fed up? Is it because we've lost the ability to hear our own words? At what point in a relationship do we cross that line? When do we go from not wanting to hurt our loved one's feelings for anything in the world to letting whatever wants to come out, come out with no second thoughts to the harm it could be causing? Do we stop caring or do we just stop paying attention?

I have been married for twenty eight years now and I have been both the giver and the receiver of some very hurtful words. Even after all of these years it never ceases to amaze me the power that words can have. I think it's important to remember that power, remember that words have the ability to cut straight to the heart. Let us not forget that words linger. You may have long forgotten those words spoken but the receiver's heart has not.

I know there are all sorts of circumstances that cause us to be careless with our words and I also know that there are times when our intention is to hurt because we've been hurt ourselves but here is the truth (my truth) about that - it's NOT okay. There is never a time when it is okay to use your words to make someone feel stupid or helpless or less than. It is not okay to chip away at someone's self esteem or say things to demean or promote a sense of inadequacy in someone because you're in a bad mood. It's not okay to burst someone else's bubble to inflate your own and it's definitely not okay to believe that you are superior in any way shape or form to another human being.

It's not okay - so just STOP.

xo,
Carrie