True Love

Marriage, well, any long term relationship, is extremely challenging. As someone who has been married for almost twenty nine years and with the same man for thirty five, I understand fully how difficult staying connected emotionally can be. Without going off on a long winded tangent about what these years have taught me I'll simply say that like so many things in life, true love comes and goes. It ebbs and flows, waxes and wanes and when it seems like it's disappeared for good, if you can hang on long enough it will resurface. Perhaps in a different form, but usually stronger and wiser.

Forever is a very long time and in our younger years when most of us think we're ready for a long term committment, we really have no idea what that word means. Life teaches us though and it can certainly be a harsh teacher at times. If true love is to prevail, it will not be without doing battle. We seem to think we're alone in that battle when we're going through it but I have seen it play out over and over again in just about every couple's relationship that I know. The most common battle I've seen is between the reality of true love and the notion of romantic love and that is a nasty battle for sure. Sometimes true love wins and sadly, often it doesn't. The pull for romantic love can be a strong one, especially when you're younger. Something to do with those pesky things we call hormones I think!

The following is something I wrote when someone I care about very much was facing that battle. I'm happy to report that true love won out and the imposter that the notion of romantic love is was exposed. Given enough time, it usually is.

BEAUTIFUL STRANGER

Where have you been as she's traveled this path
Holding onto love she feels wasn't meant to last
Wanting so desperately to believe in the lie
Willingly watching as her life passes her by

Going with the flow as the days turn into years
Telling herself all the things she ever needs to hear
Convincing her heart this is how love's suppose to be
Maybe you'll be a good enough reason to allow herself to leave

You're just a beautiful stranger, that's what you are
You're every bit as elusive as a shooting star
Shining your light all across her sky
She'll take what you're offering before you pass on by

Starting to feel what she's denied for so long
She's not sure how this love of hers turned so wrong
Maybe you have been her truth all along
Or maybe you're just good material for another sad love song

It's been so long that she's lived like this
Never imagined her wake up call would be held in your kiss
Where have you been as she's longed and she's waited
Standing idly by as her dream for romantic love faded

You're just a beautiful stranger, that's what you are
You're every bit as elusive as a shooting star
She's not able to grab you, but she believes you're real
Stirring things up in her that she'd forgotten how to feel

She's been so disconnected from what matters to her
Feeling not rocking the boat has been the better choice for sure
How can she walk away and ignore what others need
To keep their worlds afloat and their hearts in one piece

Those little lives depend on her to keep them whole
She's trying her best to do it but it's taking it's toll
I pray she doesn't sacrifice it all and act in haste
Because the love they bring to her, you can never replace

You're just a beautiful stranger, you know you can't be more
So let her hold you close before you walk out that door
Remind her for a little while how good lovin's suppose to feel
But remind her that tonight's goodbye is part of this deal

True love's reality is never what you think it will be
Or maybe love's forever can't compare to being free
So slowly she's found other ways to fill the void
Not giving true love a chance to fill the emptiness with joy

Then she starts to believe that it's not enough
Going through the motions starts to get so tough
And then one day she sees what she wants in a stranger's smile
And realizes that feeling has been gone for a long, long while

She doesn't know if her life will ever change
Or if you met at another time things would be the same
She does remain hopeful true love's hold won't always burn
And keeps her heart open to the possibility that it will return

Eventually she'll be grateful for her time with you
Grateful for what this false connection's had the power to do
Don't ever convince yourself that you're more than what you are
It won't be long before you'll be someone else's shooting star

Oh beautiful stranger it's important that you know
Regardless of what she tells you she'll be just fine when you go
Your shooting star will pave the way for her true love to stay
It's time to take what you've been selling and be on your way

xo,
Carrie