Miss H.

Today is my last official day with my client. I'll be starting to care for an eight week old baby next week and I can't commit timewise to both jobs. My time with her has been a wonderful experience and I'm going to miss her.

I'm going to miss her sense of humor. It's amazing with all of her health issues that she still has one, but boy does she ever! I'll miss when she makes up her own words because she can't remember the proper pronounciation and I have to rack my brain to try to figure out what it is she's saying to me so as not to embarass her. I'll miss trying to decipher her grocery lists when words like bowels appear on it instead of bowls. I'll miss the sweet aroma of her Popeyes fried chicken where a weekly trip to the drive through has been part of the routine since I began with her over a year ago. I told her the other day that if I die before she does, I want her to bring me a piece of Popeyes chicken on my deathbed so I can go to heaven knowing if it tastes as good as it smells! She said, "But then everyone will say that Miss H. killed you with her gluten chicken, but I'll do it for you baby."

That's another thing that I will miss greatly, her calling me baby. "How you doin' baby?", "It's okay, it's in God's hands baby." She has definitely been good for my self esteem. Noone else says to me, "Girl...if I had a figure like yours, I'd be gettin' busy ALL the time!" I'll never be able to hear Aretha sing "Respect" again without envisioning Miss H. belt it out (slightly off key) at the top of her lungs while snapping her fingers and grooving to the beat as we ride down the road.

I know one of the things I'll miss most is the feeling I get when she allows herself to become vulnerable with me. Like when we're at the doctors office and she has the nurse come and get me from the waiting room to come and be with her because she doesn't want to be alone when the doctor delivers the latest update or reprimands her yet again for not following his orders. Or like the time when I accompanied her to a medical procedure that she was petrified to be put to sleep for because the last time she'd been put to sleep there were complications and she almost didn't wake up. There was a nurse doing the pre-procedure check in who was not being very sensitive to that fear at all and though my client is very capable of speaking up for herself, she sensed my extreme irritation with this nurse and invited me to speak up on her behalf simply by giving me the look that I've come to know means, "Have at it!" Sometimes even though we're capable ourselves, it's just nice to know that someone has your back. Knowing that someone trusts you enough to show their vulnerability feeds the desire to guard that trust with your life.

There's alot I'm going to miss about her, even the stories that I've heard at least 100 times about all of the dysfunctional people in her building. One time I was there and the person living above her was walking around in what my client perceived as a purposeful manner in order to make noise above our heads, so she grabbed her cane and started whacking the heck out of the ceiling, leaving a mark every time and yelling, "Yeah, we hear you...we hear you!" That was one of my first introductions to Miss H. and I knew right then and there that my time with her was going to be very entertaining.

I'll especially miss her faith. Her faith, like the rest of ours, is challenged on a daily basis but somehow she manages never to lose it. It's inspirational to be around and I think that might be the most important lesson I'll take with me. That or if you're a size 52 DDD you can hide just about anything in your bra and noone will notice! One day we were driving and all of a sudden I heard a beep coming from her chest. We looked at eachother with puzzled faces as she reached into her bra and pulled out a portable phone which she had forgotten to put back on the charger in her living room. I laughed so hard when she proceeded to tell me that when she was living back home in a not so great neighborhood she used to pack a pistol in her bra! Can you imagine?

Oh yes, it's been an enlightening time and while I plan to keep in touch, I know life happens and the best of intentions can fall by the wayside. I know I've helped her in numerous ways over the past year and a half but I'm not sure if she knows how much she's helped me to grow as a person. I'm going to make sure I speak that to her today.

Thank you Miss H. I'll miss you and I'll always be grateful for our connection. God Bless.

xo,
Carrie